Faceless
by MissGail
Summary: Can Sam's love rescue Jason from his own personal hell.
1. Chapter 1

**Faceless**

Summary: After learning Liz might be pregnant Sam confronts Jason in the PH nursery. Heart shattered Sam decides to leave Port Charles, taking her love from Jason. As the years went by Jason slowly turned into a bitter, withdrawn, cold, angry man, who lashes out at everyone and everything. Jason's loved ones reach out to the only person who can save him, Sam. Is Sam strong enough to expose her heart once more to a man that broke it into a million pieces. Can her love rescue Jason from the abyss or will he remain faceless and lost forever?

Faceless - Lyrics by Red – Jason's Song

A voice screaming from within.

Begging just to feel again

Can't find who I am without you near me.

I'd give anything to live, without you I don't exist.

You're the only who saves me from myself.

I abandoned this love and laid it to rest

And now I'm one of the forgotten

I'm not, I'm not myself.

Feel like I'm someone else.

Fallen and faceless

So hollow, hollow inside

A part of me is dead

Need you to live again

Can you replace this I'm hollow, hollow and faceless

Shadows growing in my mind

Ones I just cant leave behind.

I'm not strong enough to pay this ransom

One more monster crawled inside.

But I swear I saw it die

Can you save me from the nothing I've become

I abandoned this love and laid it to rest

And now I'm one of the forgotten

I'm not, I'm not myself.

Feel like I'm someone else.

Fallen and faceless

So hollow, hollow inside

A part of me is dead

Need you to live again

Can you replace this I'm hollow, hollow and faceless

Staring at the front door Carly could not believe she was swallowing her pride and asking this women for assistance. "Damn you Jason Morgan for forcing me to reach out to her for help." shaking her head in disgust she knocked on the door.

Hearing the sound of little feet skipping along hard wood floors Carly grinned when the door opened and wide dark brown eyes stared up at her. "Is your mommy at home?" Seeing him nod she waited for a few seconds before continuing "Can you get her for me?"

Spinning around the little guy yelled "Mommy, the mean lady is at the door."

Muttering "mean lady, what the hell!" Wanting to rip into Elizabeth Carly had to take a deep breath and remember why she was here, Jason.

"What do you want?"

"Nice to see you to. Loved the little nickname your son has for me, wonder were he got it from?"

"I don't have all day to deal with you, get to the point Carly."

Scowling Carly felt her blood pressure rise. Remembering she was doing this for Jason she swallowed her rage and continued politely "May I come in?"

Smirking Liz reached down picking up Jake, planting him on her thigh. Glaring at Carly, she pressed a soft kiss to Jakes forehead. "Come in."

Unconsciously Carly reached to stroke Jakes head but was stopped when Liz jerked him away. "How can I help you?"

Inhaling Carly forced a smile to her lips. "I am here because of Jason, he is in a bad place and I really think it would be nice if he saw the little guy."

Sitting on the couch, Jake bounced on her lap. "Did Jason ask you to come see me?"

"Jason needs Jake, that little boy could give him some much needed happiness." clapping her hands, she wiggled her fingers causing Jake to grin and giggle.

"Carly, I can't." Sighing Liz pressed her lips to the top of Jake's head. "Jason knows what has to happen in order for us to all be together. I don't want my son around the dangerous element that surrounds his lifestyle."

"You knew who Jason was when you hooked up, did you believe he was going to change his entire life?"

"As soon as Jake was born Jason should have wanted to change who he was for his son. I'm not you Carly, I will not put my boys in danger for anyone." Gingerly placing Jake on the ground with some toys Liz got to her feet "I have the safety of my son to think about, I can not help Jason."

Carly knew that Liz was not going to change her mind which meant she didn't need to play nice any longer. "If I remember correctly you were willingly to move in with Jason and play house. But as soon as you learned that Jason was not willing to leave Sam and wanted shared custody, your tune changed. You are so transparent and pathetic."

Fuming Elizabeth moved to the door "Its time for you to leave Carly."

Squatting in front of Jake Carly grabbed one of his toys, dangling it in front of him. "See you later baby boy." Smiling at Liz she moved to the door "You truly are a selfish bitch." Aggravated Liz slammed the door in her face.

"That went well. Time to move onto plan B"

The men before him trembled with fear. He should feel some spark of sympathy, a flicker of human compassion, but he felt nothing. Taking out his gun, flashing it before them he knew it wouldn't take long before they began to tell him what he needed.

Four years had come and gone and life had changed. Michael and Morgan were healthy and happy. With Jax by her side Carly calmed down causing him less drama. Sonny had been rock solid and steady, growing their business. Jason knew he should be happy but he was living in a hell of his own design.

Her memory tormented him. Remembering the day she left him played in his mind on a loop. The look on her face when he told her about asking Liz to marry him, the pain he inflicted and the hurt in those big brown eyes haunted his dreams.

When he learned that Sam had left PC something inside him broke. Trying to regain control of his life he attempted to move on with Liz, Jake was his son and the only thing he had left. Elizabeth wanted, needed him to change, she did not want her sons around him and the lifestyle he offered. The change of heart confused him, prior to Sam leaving all Liz wanted was him and starting a family together, but as soon as Sam left Liz changed. Jason was not allowed to be a part of his son's life.

Broken and hollow Jason killed any emotion he had left, replacing it with anger and hate. He deserved the life he created for himself because he had betrayed the only thing that was ever true and beautiful to him, her broken heart sealed his fate.

"Mister Morgan, please...I.. I told you we don't know anything.. please I.. I swear..."

Returning his attention to the men at his feet Jason focused all his anguish onto them. "That is the wrong answer." The screams of men filled the empty warehouse as Jason Morgan killed a little more of himself.


	2. Chapter 2

Faceless - Chapter 2

Run. Faster. Hard. Further. Just run. Get away. Hide. Don't stop running. Fear fueling her frantic pace she had to get away. Looking over her shoulder, the darkness was closing in, long slender fingers lapped at her feet. Run faster, Sam, get away. Focusing on the shadows at her feet she screamed when hard fingers dug into her arms, pulling her into the blackness, a deep voice rang in her ears. "You are damaged and broken." the growling intensified as the voice became louder "No one will ever have you. No one." She had not run fast enough. She could not get away. Being dragged into the darkness, she fought and screamed, trying to get away. She cried out to him "Please, hear me. I need you to find me. Do not leave me alone." Enveloped by darkness a strong hand grabbed her throat, hissing in her ear "He will never come for you... He has her, she is not broken or damaged, she is perfect and you are nothing."

Sitting straight up Sam screamed " NOOOOO" Panicked she scanned her bedroom excepting to see a monster looming in the darkness. Once she released it was only a dream Sam fell back rolling onto her side. "Get a grip Sam." Inhaling deeply she ran her fingers through messy hair, she had not had that dream in over a year. Why was she thinking about him?

When Sam left Port Charles she was a shell of who she use to be. Feeling worthless and unloved she scolded herself for believing in love and and the idea of home. Her mother had tried to talk her into staying in town but Sam knew the first time she saw them the dagger that was lodged in her heart would turn inflicting more pain and suffering, Sam was tired of feeling bad and abandoned.

The first few months she traveled from state to state, taking odd jobs long enough to get money to pack up and leave again. The further away she got from PC the better she felt but each night all the self-doubt and pain she was desperate to escape found her.

A year into her travels she met a women that changed her life. Patty Eymard owned a horse ranch in Montana. Having lost her husband 15 years before she preserved his memory by growing the ranch. The couple never had children so they had taken in foster children and children with special needs. They were responsible for giving unwanted children the unconditional love and home deserved. When Patty offered Sam a job and a place to sleep she happily accepted. The experience she had caring for her brother was such a benefit Patty had put her in charge of caring for the kids with mental retardation.

At first Sam had kept to herself, taking all her meals in her room, she was polite and courteous to her host but did not want to close to her or any other human. She loved working with the horses and found that farm life suited her but each time Patty wanted to learn who she was Sam retreated into herself but Patty never allowed her to retreat to far. With loving guidance Sam slowly began to heal, realizing her worth and how beautiful she truly was, she had so much to offer and love to give.

A soft knocking on her bedroom snapped her back into reality. "Sam, are you ok?" a high pitched voice mumbled.

Smiling Sam got out of bed and padded over to door. In the doorway a tiny, blond haired child stood, a teddy bear tucked under her arm.

"Liza what are you doing out of bed?" Kneeling Sam gingerly tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I heard you scream, it scared me." Wide, trusting eyes, pulled on her heart strings. "There is nothing to fear sweetling, I just had a bad dream."

"Was a monster trying to get you?"

"No not a monster." Not wanting to scare her Sam continued "I dreamed that my favorite pair of boots went missing."

Giggling the little girl muttered as she returned to her room "You are silly Sam."

Watching as Liza disappeared down the hall Sam shut the door and returned to her bed. Staring up at the ceiling she whispered into the darkness "I will not give you the power to hurt me again." As heavy eyelids slowly shut the last image engraved in her mind were brilliant blue eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

Faceless – Chapter Three

In the distance Jason heard the twinkling sound of carousel music. Walking down a long, dark hallway, at the end a soft white glow outlined a door in the darkness. Opening the door Jason saw Sam sitting on the floor of the nursery, a box of baby stuff between her legs, Jason then watched as he entered the room. Confused he realized he was watching the conversation with Sam that changed his life. Prior to their final meeting in the nursery Jason remembered telling Sam on the rooftop that Elizabeth was pregnant and it could be his, the look in her eyes knocked the air from his lungs.

"_You always had a reason why it was the wrong time. Jason, how could you deny me a child and give one to Elizabeth."_

Jason listened as his dream persona gave her some poor excuse about not planning on giving Liz a child. How he had never been in this type of situation before, that it wasn't like Carly and Michael or even Sam and her unborn child. How he was sorry for pushing her away that he took he choice away from her.

"If the baby is yours don't you want to raise it with Elizabeth? Of course you would, in fact if I know you at all I would guess you have already asked her to marry you."

Jason knew what came next, helpless to stop it, he could not take his eyes off Sam as dream Jason told her if Liz was pregnant with his baby he would marry her. The anguish on her face caused him physical pain, he never believed he was capable of wounding her so badly.

"_She is getting everything I have ever wanted, she is pregnant with your child and I am only a memory."_

Jason screamed at dream Jason. 'Don't let her go, please." Standing in the doorway Jason cried out in pain as Sam released dream Jason's arm and walked right through him and out the door.

Falling to his knees Jason sobbed "We need her, she is our heart, without her we can not live." Suddenly as if dream Jason became aware of his presence the men looked at each other, broken and lost.

"Jason!"

Unconsciously Jason grabbed his gun pointing it in the direction of the voice.

"Damn, its just me." Sonny gazed at his oldest and dearest friend. "Are you ok, thought I heard you cry out."

"I am fine."

Concerned Sonny pressed "You didn't sound fine to me."

"I said I'm fine." angry energy rolled through him like a tide, silently cautioning anyone who would press him.

Respecting his wishes Sonny dropped the concern. "Did you get anywhere with the Mendoza men?

"Nothing. I pushed them beyond their limits, they remained consistent with the story, they don't know anything about the ambush."

"Max told me you really messed them up."

Jason shrugged and continued to stare forward. "I did my job."

"I am sending you down to the island to supervise the new warehouse operations."

"Send Max or Milo, hell send Stan he is always bitching about wanting to get away. You need me here to deal with the Mendoza family."

"I will handle the Mendoza's, I want you on the island."

Scowling Jason pocketed his gun "Fine. I will this afternoon." slamming the door behind him Sonny knew Jason was not pleased.

Opening his phone he called Carly. "He is leaving this afternoon."

"Great. I'm outside Alexis office, are you sure she will give me Sam's location."

"Only if you ask nicely." hearing Carly grumble Sonny laughed "Good luck."

"Thank you for meeting me on such short notice."

Alexis nodded "You said it was an emergency."

"It is." Taking a deep breath Carly continued "I need to get a hold of Sam."

Brow furrowed Alexis shook her head "Why? Last time I checked you and my daughter were not close."

"We aren't but I need her help with Jason."

Alexis chuckled coldly "And why would Sam want to help Jason? He broke up with her then turned around and got Elizabeth Webber pregnant, the man broke her heart and drove her away from Port Charles."

Carly stared at the women across from her. "Are you really going to lay Sam's departure from Port Charles at Jason's feet?"

"Is that so hard to believe? He destroyed Sam, thus robbing me the chance to bond with my daughter."

It was Carly's time to chuckle. "Are you serious? The amount of guilt you forced down Jason's throat suffocated him. Breaking up with Sam was the hardest thing the man has ever had to do."

"Carly if you are trying to plead Jason's case you are wasting your breath. Jason is a killer, a criminal who has no regard for society's rules and limitations. Excuse me for not thinking about his happiness, karma finally caught up with him and it almost killed my child."

"You are unbelievable Jason made Sam happy, he accepted the good and the bad, he made Sam believe she was worth while and loved, why would you want to deny your daughter that kind of love?"

"What good would that love do if she was dead? Sam is young she will love again, a good man, someone wo..."

"Someone who is acceptable in your eyes, Sam's wishes be damned."

Alexis glared at Carly "We are finished Carly, stay away from my daughter."

Carly shrugged then smirked "You don't know where she is do you?" watching Alexis shift in her chair Carly laughed "Guess Sam didn't feel like you were good enough to be her mom." she then turned and left.

Alexis stared at the closed door, whispering "It was my fault." eyes closing silent tears slide down her cheeks.


	4. Chapter 4

Faceless – Chapter 4

Watching the sunrise had become one of Sam's favorite things to do since settling in Montana. The clean country air, the deer, bison, and birds, the quiet and peace that settled around the ranch was very therapeutic for her. Sam would have never labeled herself a nature girl but she discovered the love to hike, go mountain biking, white water rafting. Sam the city girl easily transitioned into Sam the country gal.

Seated on the picnic bench near the barn she grinned when three of her favorite people came running towards her. Liza at the age of 11 was, the head strong leader of the trio. Always working an angle, figuring things out, if there was trouble to get into she would be right in the middle of it. Seth, was the 9 year old trickster, from whoopee cushions to trick gum, if a joke was to be told he was the one to tell it. Unfortunately Liza took advantage of Seth's desire to cause chaos using it to further her mischievous plans. The baby of the group was Carrie, bright red hair and freckled 7 year old. Extremely shy and introverted, her troubled and abusive past made her afraid of new people. Because of her unease around strangers Liza and Seth were extremely protective of the little red head. All three suffered from mild mental retardation, they had the capacity to learn but just needed a little more attention and slower pacing. Their innocence reminded her so much of Danny, which made her love them more.

Plopping down next to her Liza handed her a postcard. "You got a letter from your little sister Sam."

Grinning "I did. How do you know its from Kristina?" Flipping the card over Sam laughed at the chubby man sitting on a beach in a pair of swim trunks, the top of his butt exposed. The wording "Missing you under the full moon in Port Charles."

"That man's butt is showing."

"Liza..." covering her mouth Carried started to laugh "You said butt."

Glaring at the little girl Liza stuck her tongue out "His butt is showing." returning her attention to Sam she grabbed the card from her hands, flipped it over, and then handed it back to her. "What does it say?"

Patting the spot to her left Carrie wedged her tiny body between Sam and Seth's. It says:

Dear Sam,

Thank you for the care package, Molly loves the doll you sent. Mom and Ric have been working a lot, so Molly and I have been spending a lot of time with the nanny. I keep telling mom that I'm old enough to watch Molly, but you know how she is. Dad has tried to spend more time with me but every time he comes over Mom gets very upset and takes it out on Ric. I saw Jason last week, he seems very sad and lonely, I bet he misses you. Well it is time for dance class. Love you Sam. Kristina.

"Who is Ric?"

"Ric is the man my mother is married to and Molly's daddy." wrapping an arm around Carrie, Sam pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

In classic Liza form one million questions started pouring from her mouth "Who is your daddy? What kinda of work does your mom do? Who is Kristina's daddy? Who is Jason? Why is he lost and lonely? Why would he be missing you?"

"Listen up nosy Nancy you get one question pre-day, you already met your quota."

Pouting Liza looked over at Seth and with a slight nod of her head he came riding to her rescue. "Who is Jason?"

Ignoring Seth, Sam scolded the little blond headed dictator "No way, one question a day Liza."

"Hey I have a mind of my own, I want to know who Jason is."

Casting a stern look in Liza's direction Sam answered Seth's question "Jason was a man that I was involved with, he was my boyfriend." Knowing how curious and boy crazy Liza was Sam gave a little more information just for her. "When I first met Jason I could not stand him. He was cold and indifferent, I honestly thought he hated me, but when I needed someone the most he was the one who helped me." Pausing Sam stared towards the horizon as she allowed herself to think about Jason and her unborn child. She remembered the day they learned she was having a girl, when she asked Jason if they could name her Lila after his grandmother. Each time she moved the joy and smile that would light up his blue eyes. The sorrow and pain he suffered when she was stillborn.

"I'm sorry."

The hurt in Liza's voice snapped Sam back into reality. "Why are you sorry?"

"I did not want to make you cry."

Unaware of tears pooling in the corner of her eyes Sam jokingly wiped them away. "I'm not crying because I'm sad, I got some dust in my eye." Watching the smile return to her face Sam sighed.

"Is that why you don't like Colton?"

Laughing Sam wrapped her arms around Carrie "Where did that come from sweetling?"

Shrugging Carrie looked up at her. "Heard Mama Patty talking about you. She said that you needed to let go of ghosts and move forward, she said Colton could make you happy if you let him."

Making a mental note to speak with Patty, Sam decided it was time for the kids to get to their chores. "Off you go loves, I will see you at lunch."

Watching them run off she thought about Patty's comments, maybe it was time to let go of the past and move forward. Colton was handsome and polite, loved children and his capacity for patience awed her. Maybe he was right man to help her move away from the past, maybe it was time to let Jason go.

Waiting for the private jet to be fueled Jason sat in the concourse brooding that he had to go to the island. Why him? Why now? He hated it down there, everyone was happy and relaxed, it literal made him want to go postal.

"Jason?"

A kid like voice gave Jason pause. Turning around he was shocked to see Kristina. "What are you doing here?"

"Mom is shipping me off to Greece. She says I need to get in touch with my Cassadine roots." Krissy rolled her eyes. "Where are you headed off to?"

"Business."

Head cocked to the side "Mmmm ok, care to expand on that."

"No."

"Okay then. Well then cya later." Turning around to walk the other way she stopped, facing him once more. "I want to give you something." Reaching into her purse Krissy handed him letter. "Maybe this will brighten your spirit." And with that she left.

"Whatever." Flipping the letter over his heart stopped the letter was addressed to Sam McCall.


	5. Chapter 5

Faceless – Chapter Five

Popping open a cold beer Jason sat on the beach enjoying the sunset. Since arriving on the island all he could think about was Sam. According to the letter she resided in Montana and worked on a farm, helping children with special needs. He knew she would be amazing with the animals and children, her compassion, loyalty, and unconditional love set her apart. Jason remembered the first time he got a glimpse of Sam's uniqueness, the day he met Danny.

_Jason watched as Sam disappeared into the back room, calling out for someone named Danny. Leading out a tall young man wearing a pair of work overalls and a red ball cap. Cautious Jason eyed the man. _

"_Who is he Sam?"_

_Jason could see the man was terrified of him, he watched as he attempted to cower but was stopped when Sam reassuring touched his arm._

_Never releasing his hand Sam quietly spoke "Jason. This is my brother Danny. Danny this is Jason. It smells really good in here did you make yourself some dinner?"_

_As the conversation before him continued Jason finally put all the pieces together, she was covering for her brother. Sam wasn't the one that killed her step-mother, Danny had._

A vibration interpreted his thoughts, digging the phone out of his pants he groaned at the name on the phone. "Yes Carly."

"Enjoying the sunshine and relaxation?"

Pinching the bridge of his nose Jason exhaled noisily "What's wrong?"

"Why do you always assume the worst?"

"Because if you are involved it usually ends up that way." not wanting to fight with her "I'm sitting on the beach right now watching the sunset."

"Do you want some company? Michael, Morgan, and Jax are away for the weekend and I have some free time."

"No. You stay in Port Charles, I'm working and don't want you to be in any danger."

Sighing Carly paused "Jase I am worried about you."

"You don't need to be, I'm fine."

"No, you are not." Taking a deep breath Carly murmured "I've been trying to hunt down Sam McCall."

At first he didn't believe he heard her right "What did you say?"

"Don't be mad at me but I think she will be able to help you." his silence made her unease "Jason?"

"Leave Sam be Carly. It has been four years, she has moved on to bigger and better things."

"Jason, ever since she left you have become a shell. I will never understand why you didn't go after her. You deserve to be happy, she made you happy."

"Drop it."

Carly was not going to drop it. "How long are you going to punish yourself?"

Jason was getting irritated "Carly I said drop it."

"Do you want to know why you are so miserable?

"No, but I'm sure you are going to tell me."

"According to society you are a misfit, a person that average people could never start to understand, much less care about. Then one day another misfit came to Port Charles, a con and drifter, a human being who was told she was trash, unworthy of love, the girl that always came in second. Both of you accepted the title of loner or outsider, resigned to the fact you would be alone. Then you found each other. Together you created a home and world based on love and trust. When Sam left your world disappeared, your purpose vanished."

Jason did not want to hear any of this. "Carly, just stop."

"No, I'm not going to stop. I want to see you happy again Jason, if not with Sam then with someone new. You can have love again."

He was over it. "Carly I will see you when I get home." Hearing her say Jason, he flipped the phone down, hanging up on her.

Taking a long drink from his beer he tried to push Carly's voice from his head. Folks get one chance at love and he blew his. He never wanted Sam to leave, even when he learned that Elizabeth might be pregnant with his child the idea that Sam would not be apart of his life never crossed his mind. He even made the mistake of going to Sam's mother to discuss what happened, the day he gave up.

"_Alexis I have done everything you've asked, I told her I don't want her any longer, over and over again, your daughter is stubborn and will never give up in something that meant so much to her. You really don't know who Sam is, what I'm doing is killing her, is this really what you want for your daughter?"_

"_I do not doubt the love you have for Sam but sometimes you have to look out for the greater good. She almost died because of you, is that what you want, to be the cause of her death?"_

_Stone faced the timber of Jason's voice changed. "I want her to be happy, she is happy with me and I am happy with her why cant that be enough for you?_

_Fuming Alexis stepped toward him. "You are a hitman Jason, a killer, do you believe you deserve to be happy?"_

"_Does your daughter deserve happiness?"_

"_Yes, and I am sure one day she will find it again, without you. Do not deny Sam the chance to be loved and protected, to have a family by someone else, another chance to love, stop being selfish and think about her."_

_Guilt was eating away at his soul and heart, he almost died because she almost died. Sam had once told him that without him some place in this world her world would go dark, what she didn't know was without her his life would be meaningless. Releasing Sam meant she would be safe and protected, she would be alive and her heart could heal._

_Exhaling in frustration Jason nodded "What I'm about to do will destroy Sam's heart so please, please, be there for her. Tell her she is beautiful and intelligent, brave and daring, that her worth can not be measured, she is special and unique, don't try to change her, she is perfect the way she is."_

"_You have my word Jason."_

For years Jason had believed that he had done the right thing. When he allowed Sam to leave his life he only did it to protect her but he was sick of doing for everyone else. Sam made him happy, she was his heart, the one he was suppose to grow old with.

Opening his phone he quickly finished his beer as he waited for Sonny to pick up.

"Hey. The island operation is on target and projected to be done earlier. I'm planning on heading out tonight and will be gone for a couple of weeks."

"Ok. Care to tell me where you are going?"

"Going to see an old friend."

"An old friend huh. Well have a good time and don't worry about us and tell Sam I said hi." Chuckling Sonny hung up. Staring at the phone a sensation came over Jason that he had not felt in a long time. As he made his way back to the cottage he realized what he was feeling, hope.


	6. Chapter 6

Faceless – Chapter Six

Angles – Within Temptation – Sam's Song

Sparkling angel, I believed you were my savior in my time of need.

Blinded by faith I couldn't hear all the whispers the warnings so clear.

I see the angels I'll lead them to your door.

Theres no escape now, no mercy no more.

No remorse cause I still remember the smile when you tore me apart.

You took my heart, deceived me from the start.

You showed me dreams, I wished they would turn into real.

You broke your promise and made me realize it was just a lie.

Sparkling angel I couldn't see your dark intentions your feelings for me

Fallen angel tell me why what is the reason the thorn in your eye.

I see the angels, I'll lead them to your door.

There's no escape now, no mercy no more.

No remorse cause I still remember the smile when you tore me apart.

You took my heart, deceived me from the start.

You showed me dreams, I wished they would turn into real.

You broke your promise and made me realize it was just a lie.

Could have been forever, now we have reached the end.

This world may failed you it doesn't give you reason why

You could've chosen a different path in life.

The smile when you tore me apart.

Riding Lily had become therapeutic for Sam. Each day she would ride, stopping at her favorite spots to meditate, read, or nap. The beautiful mare was chestnut brown, the markings on her nose and head looked like a flower. When she first approached Patty about Lily she learned that horse was temperamental and no one trusted her enough to ride, but Sam was determined to make the horse hers. With patience, trust, and a gentle yet firm touch the mare began to trust her. The first time she rode Lily the bond between them was instant, no matter where Sam might end up Lily would be with her.

Sitting under her favorite tree Sam allowed herself to think about the past. It had taken nearly three years for her spirit and mind to heal. Leaving Port Charles had been the best choice for her, the idea of seeing a pregnant Liz was more then she could bear. After all these years her heart still ached when she thought about Liz and Jason having a child. Liz had everything Sam wanted, Jason, a baby, family, and the one thing she craved more then anything, a place to call home.

Her heart had not healed. She had been a fool to believe in Jason's love, some people were just not meant to give love and receive in love in return. When she needed him the most he walked away and never looked back. Sam remembered the day love betrayed her.

_Sam wiped the tears from the eyes. Jason was amazing, even though he hated Alexis he put his feelings aside for her. As he made his way towards her bed she could tell something was bothering him. _

"_What is wrong?" reaching for his hand, she smiled when he leaned down and kissed her cheek. _

_Settling in next to her bed Jason gently stroked the side of her face "Nothing, just so happy you are ok."_

"_I will feel better when I can get home, I don't know how anyone can heal in this awful beds." looking down at the ring on her finger all she could do was stare "when I get out of here the first thing I'm going to do is start planning our wedding. We have waited to long and so much has happened, its our time Jason."_

"_Sam." Jason tried to interpret her._

"_Do you want a winter or fall wedding? Oh we should go to Hawaii, just you and me."_

"_Sam."_

_Chuckling Sam held his hand "What was I thinking, I'm sure you don't want to have a big wedding."_

"_Sam!"_

_Stopping she gazed into blue eyes and gasped at what she saw, sorrow and pain, something was wrong. Threading her fingers with his she almost choked at the sadness that was radiating from him. "Jason?"_

"_I can't marry you... my life is to dangerous... I have to let you go."_

_Unable to process what he was saying Sam shook her head, gripping his hand tighter. "Why are you saying that?"_

_Jason knew if he looked her in the eyes he would not be able to let go. "You almost died because of me."_

_Frantic Sam reached for his face, trying to force him to look at her. "But I didn't. I'm fine Jason... " blinded by tears, her voice cracked "please... look at me. You don't love me anymore?" _

_The pain in her voice caused Jason to bow his head, her anguish was going to kill him. "I'm sorry Sam." Jerking his hand away, he turned and left her._

_Shaking Sam screamed "No! Jason... please, come back... don't leave me alone... please..." Grasping her chest Sam felt like her heart had split apart as love walked out of her life._

"Oh god." Crying Sam angrily wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Stop this." Getting to her feet Sam screamed as loud as she could, the sound causing Lily to lift her head and stare. "Jason Morgan you no longer have the power to hurt me." Walking towards the mare Sam was so sick and tired of being afraid. Fearing love had turned her into an island, she deserved to be happy, to give unconditional love and have it returned.

Rubbing the horses nose, Sam wrapped her arms around Lily's strong neck, hugging tightly, whispering into the mane "time to let it all go Lily." As if the horse understood, Lily lifted her head, telling Sam it was time to return to the farm. Grinning Sam mounted the horse, talking to her the entire ride home. "I am going to go on that date with Colton. He is an amazing man and I deserve that. Wonder where he will take me?" Each step closer to the farm made Sam feel better, her future had been placed in front of her, all she had to do was take the first step. "Maybe Alexis would allow Kristina to visit, sure she is a city girl but I am sure she would love to ride and spend the week with me."

Returning to the farm Sam watched as Liza flew off the porch racing towards her. Dismounting Lily, Sam handed over the reigns to one of the stable hands. "See that she is washed and then fed."

"Slow down Liza, you will hurt yourself."

Gasping Liza grabbed Sam's arm "You have to come to the house, you have a visitor."

Allowing Liza to lead her towards the house Sam admitted she was confused "Slow down hun, a visitor?"

Nodding happily Liza pulled harder "Yes. He says he is an old friend. Sam he is so very handsome. I hope one day I could find a friend like him."

Curious Sam noted a strange truck parked in the drive. Clueless she followed Liza into the living room, only to stop dead in her tracks. Seated next to Patty was the source of her heart ache and fear, a man she had just pledge to let go. Closing her eyes she took a deep breathe composing herself. Feeling a tug on her shirt she looked down at Liza "He says his name is Jason. Jason Morgan."


	7. Chapter 7

Faceless – Chapter Seven

"What is that?"

Looking over at him she followed his line of sight. "That is Emma" Sam giggled.

Walking over to the big dog, she wrapped her arms around the massive neck and head of the mastiff. Digging her fingers into many wrinkles she roughly massaged the huge dog.

"This little girl found me three years ago. I was working in New Mexico at an animal shelter and she was scheduled to be put down because of her size. " Leaning down Sam pressed a quick kiss to the dog's muzzle. "I couldn't let her be killed so I kidnapped her."

Smirking Jason reached out to pet the huge dog. "This dog outweighs you by at least 100lbs."

"Yeah well, she might look mean, but at heart she is a loyal, loving animal." petting the dog Sam looked at her faithful companion and smiled "the only draw back was the fact that because of her size it was hard to rent an apartment or home so we have spent a couple nights sleeping in my car."

Jason stared at Sam "Well Emma is fortunate to have found you."

Standing up Sam confronted him "What are you doing here?"

"Honestly I'm not really sure." Spinning around Jason slowly walked toward the fence line.

Patting the top of Emma's head Sam watched as he reached out, allowing Lily to touch the palm of his hand. Sighing moved to stand next to him, gazing onto the horizon "It's pretty here. At night you can hear wolves howling at the crystal clear evening sky."

"I can see why you like it here, it seems peaceful." gingerly petting the side of the mares neck Jason finally murmured "Kristina and I crossed paths while I was waiting for the jet to be readied. She handed me a letter with your address on it."

"In her last letter she told me Alexis was sending her to Greece."

"She didn't seem thrilled to be leaving." Jason turned to look at Sam "I am not sure why I came Sam. The past few years have been hard, I have many regrets, those mistakes are haunting me."

"I'm sorry to hear that. I can understand being haunted by demons, have a few of them myself." Not able to look at him she concentrated on Lily "You have to let the past go Jason, no good can come from dwelling on things you can't change. Just need to pick up the pieces and take it one day at a time."

"Is that what you have done, let go of the past?"

Hearing the uncertainty in his voice Sam finally met his gaze. "I had to, the past was killing me. I would wake up each day focusing on what went wrong, the questions consumed me, I got so sick of being alone. One day I got up and just said enough, I was sick of feeling bad, tired of being so angry, bitter at the world." Sam chuckled "I had the mother of all pity parties for years."

Perplexed Jason questioned her "Alone? Why did you feel alone?"

"Because I was alone. Before I met you I had Danny in my life, sure we didn't live together but I knew he was around. When you left me for the first time I didn't have anyone." Sam knew her words did not comfort him. "When the time is right you will know it. Your heart, mind, and soul will tell you."

Losing himself in the warmth of her dark brown eyes, he was speechless.

Smiling Sam waved her hand in front of his face "Earth to Jason." laughing "Impressed with my logic huh."

Before Jason could comment a whirlwind of dust came racing down the driveway towards them. As a large red truck pulled up Jason felt Sam lean away from then whisper "crude."

"What's wrong?"

"My date is here."

"Oh." a huge lump suddenly formed in Jason's throat. Unsure on what to do next he put up the walls that had protected him for years, walls he only lowered for her. "I shouldn't have come."

Grabbing for his hand Sam latched onto thumb, squeezing it affectionately. "You are welcome here. Let me tell Colton whats going on, I will get you settled then he and I can leave."

Before he caught himself he blurted out "You are still going to go out with him?"

Smirking Sam brushed hair from her face "Jason Morgan are you jealous?" seeing him kicking the ground and look away she started to laugh harder. "Never a dull moment with you around Jason." Still holding his thumb she pulled him to the house "Come on I have some people I want you to met."


	8. Chapter 8

Faceless – Chapter Eight

Awake and Alive – Skillet – Jason and Sam Song

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I'm at war with the world and they try to pull me into the dark

I struggle to find my faith As I'm slipping from your arms

It's getting harder to stay awake and my strength is fading fast

You breathe into me at last

I'm awake I'm alive

Now I know what I believe inside

Now it's my time, I'll do what I want because this is my life

Here, right now I'll stand my ground and never back down

I know what I believe inside, I'm awake and I'm alive

I'm at war with the world cause I ain't never gonna to sell my soul

I've already made up my mind

No matter what I cant be bought or sold

When my faith is getting weak and I feel like giving in

You breathe into me again

I'm awake I'm alive

Now I know what I believe inside

Now it's my time, I'll do what I want because this is my life

Here, right now I'll stand my ground and never back down

I know what I believe inside, I'm awake and I'm alive

Waking up

Waking up

Waking up

In the dark I can feel you in my sleep

In your arms I feel you breathe into me

Forever hold this heart that I will give to you

Forever I will live for you

The porch creaked as the rocking chair was pulled forward then back. Sipping on a glass of homemade lemonade Jason wondered if Sam ever learned to cook. Realizing the years he had lost with her his resolve to win her back only became more clear. Her presence was forcing painful memories to surface.

"_Where is she?"_

_Jason was mad, focusing his rage on Alexis, he watched as she quickly grabbed her cell phone and took a single step backwards. "You told me Sam would be safe and happy with you, Alexis you promised me."_

"_I didn't know what she was going to do, how could I have? I instructed Sam like we planned, then she left. Jason, I've not seen her since."_

_The anger that had been dammed finally Violence was building inside of him Picking up a chair in her office he launched it into the wall, splintering the wood sending debris threw out the room._

"_Jason calm down, please." Alexis was walking a fine line she could not push him. "Do you think I wanted her to leave, my own daughter?" cautious she took a step forward. "I wanted her to become a part of my fam..."_

"_Shut the fuck up!" shaking he glared at her "She had a family, me! Sam was my family Alexis, she was my world. I would have sacrificed all that I had in order to keep her safe and loved, died for her, but that clearly was not enough for you." He was losing it, if he didn't remove himself from her presence, he would be serving 55 to life. "You don't get it Alexis I destroyed her at your request. Sam always believed herself unworthy of love, forever number two, never good enough for anyone. Time and patience helped old wounds disappear, my love slowly healed her heart."_

"_Give me a break, you are not the victim Jason, we both agreed that Sam was better off without you. She was shot because of you, almost died in your arms." _

_Roaring Jason's blue eyes flashed dangerously. "Enough. I am tired of listening to you." reaching for his gun he watched as Alexis went for the phone on her desk. Before she could reach it he yanked the connection from the wall and threw the phone across the room._

_Terrified Alexis felt trapped and was suddenly feared him. "What are you doing?"_

"_Nothing... yet. But if anything bad happens to Sam." Holstering the gun he turned around and left the room._

_Outside of the office Jason yelled then punched a hole in the wall. He was pissed at Alexis but the majority of his anger came from his own guilt, as much as he hated the witch her words were true, he had failed Sam._

"So you are the hero in her dreams, the one that chases away self imposed demons." opening the screen door Patty took a sit on the porch swing "I always believed that "Jason" was the monster, the entity Sam was so desperate to escape in her nightmares."

"The way I treated her, maybe I am the monster."

Patty observed the sullen stranger. From the moment Sam introduced him to the housed hold she knew that his man held the key to Samantha's heart. They might not have known it but unconsciously their need to be close to each other was evident. Physical touch was clearly displayed, Sam had never released the man's hand, petite fingers remained coiled around his much larger digits. Each time she spoke the man gazed down at her, as if each word she spoke was a life line to his soul. But the most telling sign was the peaceful energy that enveloped the two, they shared something special and unique, a connection most spend their whole life time searching for.

"Mistakes don't have to define who you are or the purpose you serve in Sam's life."

Shrugging Jason murmured "Maybe." Looking over at the older women "Thank you for helping her. She deserves to be happy and loved."

"Yes she does and so do you."

"You don't know anything about me."

"True enough but I do know Samantha, you are important to her." She watched as he got up to leave the porch. "Before I was told who you are I was afraid that you might harm her."

Jason stopped and turned his icy gaze locked onto her. "I would never hurt her."

"Your eyes told me differently." Patty got up and went to stand before him "Eyes can tell you all you need to know about a person and your eyes told me you were hollow, angry, and sad. But the moment you saw Samantha a transformation occurred, life flooded your eyes."

Before Jason could comment Patty patted his arm "We have no extra room in the house but I instructed one of the ranch hands to set you up in the barn." smiling she quietly returned to the house.

Inhaling deeply Jason stared out into the darkness. He was so tired of being angry and sad, the only time he had ever felt any lasting peace was when Sam was at his side. Patty was correct Sam made him feel alive. Past mistakes were slowly killing him and he was not ready to surrender to death.

Casting his eyes upwards Jason made a promise to the stars above "I will never fail her again." As if nature was responding to his declaration the silence of the evening was broken as wolves lifted their heads to the same night sky and began to howl.

Smiling Jason walked off the porch and headed to the barn, tomorrow he would start living again.

Sam tried to focus on what Colton was talking about but all she could think about was Jason. He was here, she didn't know why or how all she knew was the fact that Jason Morgan was waiting for her back at the ranch.

"You look beautiful tonight."

"Huh?" looking across the table she forced herself to focus. "Thanks. You look nice as well."

Colton chuckled "So who is the guy?"

"Just an old friend from Port Charles." Sam did not want to talk about Jason. "So how long have you known Patty?" Before Colton even started to speak Sam was once more lost in her thoughts. What should she do now? Hadn't she given up the past? Wasn't he her past?

Heart racing Sam felt giddy and happy, she could not believe that after all these years he still remembered her. Countless nights the mere thought of him was all she needed to conquer the demons that stalked her dreams. She would never tell him but the first thing she wanted to do after seeing him was lay her head on his chest and listen to the steady beat of his heart. To feel his arms around her, keeping her safe, making her feel loved and wanted, made her feel alive.

"Sam? Are you ok?"

Unaware that she was crying she roughly wiped her face. "Yes. I am sorry." Reaching across the table she grabbed his hand. "Can you take me back to the ranch?"

Concerned Colton nodded "Of course. Are you sure you are ok?"

Nodding she smiled. "Yes for the first time in a long time I know I will be ok. I'm going to start living again."


End file.
